Totally UNqualified

If I were to take just one month to do what you do on an average day
at work, I would have a wealth-of-knowledge more than I currently
have. No doubt. But it feels kinda funny that the lack of
experience on my resume is everything that is being used to train
professionals here! It still is new to me. But empowering the
creative mind is a rarity. The creative process is not easily
embraced. How do you become free enough to explore your own creativity?

Who knew that my random, creative thought process would be such a
commodity? I'm still preparing for my 12 hour course. I'll be
teaching a school-full of Preschool teachers about how to incorporate
art into their lessons. How fascinating! It's something I naturally
love do in life. Have any creative ideas or input?

Missing Sunday Drives

I'm not be home for my best friend's dad's funeral. Really bummed to not be around. Luckily, I at least have Skype for $.02/minute phone calls, even if we do get disconnected every few minutes. I miss being around to process the deeper stuff or being able to get away, driving to the beach with the radio blasting. Time has flown by. I guess we are growing up on both sides of the earth. It's been good to come to this place in the journey, still safe and secure.

Being Proactive

Over the past 13 years, I've been hearing this word "proactive". It's taken me that long to begin to make it a part of my life. I didn't understand it. I thought proactivity was being overbearing, obnoxious or invasive. Not something I enjoyed from others, nor wanted to portray.

The same with "connection" and "community." I've always been connected to something at some extent. You can't help but be connected if you're next to the same people in the same place week after week. And I thought community was the connection between disconnected people. That was enough to make us connected, enough for a community.

But then I flew to Benin, West Africa. I saw a community different from everything I'd ever seen. When a young man passed away, the entire city wore black bands on their arm. For weeks, people would take food to the family. No duh, this man's life was one of great influence. He was a youth leader and was killed in a tragic accident. There was a community. People were deeply connected. They were proactive. I was missing something.

Proactive: making opportunities available, letting people know about them and making them happen.

Hoping I can accomplish great things and do so gracefully.

Fudgsicles!

Kaylor's on a chocolate kick and I love Fudgsicles! We recently discovered Chocolate Volts! Delicious!!! And there only 20 cents! We just bout $2 worth. That should last us through next week... Maybe. It's been hot lately.

On your own

I've entered into the 6th month. I've stepped into the time frame in which I was so skeptical about. Yet, I've hit a few breaking points - in a good way.

So I know that I'm completely supported. And yet, I have come to a point where I feel more confident in who I am, the choices I make, and the perspective I have.

I don't have the security of nearby friends who, over a coffee break, help me process through life. I don't have the immediate surroundings of family to get me through the everyday drama. But being away from it all, I see that I'm really still okay.

Don't get me wrong, I couldn't do it without the connections that I have made along the journey. Every step of the way, someone significant has shown up. Definitely necessary.

Fire, Water and Rice Paddies

What did you do today?

Reminded of Reality

So I went with Sarah, Luke and their 3 kids to the Malang English gathering tonight.

I sat with Robyn and Kevin. Spoke with Jesse, Debbie, Lindley and her sister. Saw Amanda and Jon, Bethany, Allan and Jo, Jan and Jenna, Mei and Rhonda, and many others. That's just a glimpse... I really like these people.

As much as I totally miss home, I'm reminded that I really do love it here too! I'm reminded of friendships I've built. And friendships that are getting deeper. I really am spoiled here. When I was scared about finding a doctor to check out my back, I found Esther, who would come to my house for physical therapy everyday - and at no cost. It really is a loving community.

I've got to maximize the time I have with the people here. How totally lucky I am!

The Details

What'd you do today? Really. I wouldn't mind if you sent the details.

I'm homesick. My comfort food - spaghetti. I have that here. Kaylor and I had spirals, but with Ragu sauce and Kraft Parmesan cheese.... delicious!

I miss the streets. I miss the sidewalks. I miss the position of the street lights. I miss the flow of traffic. I miss the neat lines of traffic - the fact that people notice the lines and stay between them. I miss skinny pedestrians on the pedestrian crossing signs. I miss dressing up for a night on the town. I miss voices and faces of people from home. I miss the variety of foods for dinner. I miss wearing short sleeves and not having to worry about insect bites. I miss the illusion of less pollution. I miss a cell phone plan that I don't have to refill. I miss being there for the bits of life. I miss cracking lame jokes and laughing at myself with people who get me... at least some times.

It is hard to change everything all at once. I'm good here, taken care of and surrounded by a great community.

But, now, this is my home. I have so much awaiting the 6 months ahead. As hard as it is tonight, I'm sure it will be worth it... But I still miss home.

Missing child

There's a 9th grader missing. A friend of one of the security guards. It's on the front page of the news papers. Been missing since Jan 5!

Today, I had physical therapy again. Yesterday was great, but today new spots are worse. Hot water bottle isn't helping much yet.

Still hopeful to get on the bike next week!

At least I'm making progress with paintings and reading while I'm down.

Arema Fans

So the other night, Kaylor, Donny and I were watching an Arema soccer game on TV. The refs took back 3 goals. After the second one, one of the fans head-butted the ref., who had to be carried out on a gurney. They brought in a new ref. And almost called back a 4th goal! The fans went crazy, head-butting a second ref and burning the field and goals.

And so now, Arema fans are banned from games - for 3 years!!!

The last twenty minutes of that game will pick up sometime later this month...

But I'm mobile again! A bit sore still, but I got sleep!

Muscle Spasms

Got checked out. A little acupuncture. Said my muscles are in shock and it's just muscle spasms. Nothing serious. Advil and a hot water bottle are great relief.

Missing the company of people at home. Glad I have friends here, but wishing I could be around home too.

Ups and downs

I got my motorcycle today!!! It came with a helmet and a jacket, too! It's blue. And the stripes are pink and white, a perfect match for my helmet! Way kewl!

But I won't be practicing today because I think the accident misaligned my back. I wasn't feeling great yesterday or today. Exhausted, sneezing, runny nose, achy neck and back, headaches, maybe a fever...

Hoping Advil will be sufficient.

A Bit Overwhelmed, Totally Excited!

Feeling a little sick and exhausted. But looking forward:

February 4-5, 11-12: Teacher Training Seminar. I'm teaching a 4 day
seminar of how to incorporate art into pre-school classes at
Kidsland. Who knew teaching Priscilla would be perfect prep me for
this!?
March 4-15: Children's outreach in Kalimantan: Pulau Kaladan and
Batulicin!!!
March 28 - April 10: Mom's teaching hula dancing!
June 13-29: Mosaic Team Creative Camp!!! 1) Charis, 2) Polehan, 3)
Batulicin, Kalimantan and 4) Denpasar, Bali

I'm working on illustrating and writing in Indonesian my children's
book, SPRING's first publication. Kaylor's baby's due in a month.
April - May, we're hoping to host a Kickball Clinic/Competition for
Junior High (SMP) and High School (SMA). And we're hoping to gather
writers and artists for SPRING's 2nd publication.

In the mean time, I'm really only studying language 1-3 and a half
hours a day, hanging out with friends, writing letters home, and
visiting Polehan once a week.

Bruised

Tonight I discovered 2 bruised areas on my arm. Apparently the
impact of the accident slammed my arm into the side rails.

All night, I couldn't stop wondering what happened to that man. Did
his friend ever come back? Will he still be alive next week? Did he
get x-rays to find out if he broke ribs?

"Still alive"

I was in an accident today. I came out of it without a scratch. On
the other hand, the man who caused the accident left his bleeding
friend behind. Today, I experienced culture SHOCK.
No 911.
No need to be a witness to the police.
No insurance.
In a car accident, the man who caused the accident fled the scene, leaving his friend behind (I got mad!)... Because they probably stole a motorcycle (stupid)... If he'd stuck around to care for his friend,
those around would have beat him for stealing the bike (ah... justice).

Iin and I took the mirkrolet to the morning, flea market. On our
way, the driver picked up one other lady. She took the front seat.
We were turning right (Traffic is opposite from the states, so it's like a left turn.). Then, crash! A motorcycle, carrying two people,
hit the side of the minivan.

The doors in the mikrolet are always open. Neither of their helmets
were clipped. So in flew two helmets and the body of the
passenger. Iin was on the side of impact, and she flew into the middle of the mikrolet on impact and grabbed my arm. This man's body laid on the floor of the mikrolet with his legs hanging out of the door. At first, we were all in shock and couldn't move. Iin
started sobbing, as she was in a motorcycle accident a couple years back.

I thought the motorcyclist was just going to move the motorcycle to the side of the road and come back for his friend. I think we all thought that. I didn't know what to do or say. But apparently, the motorcycle driver rode off - without his friend! He really didn't come back!!!!

I didn't know if this man was dying at my feet. But no one was doing anything. I couldn't use any of the words I know! I didn't think he should be moved because he probably broke his back. I felt so helpless sitting there. The only words that I could mutter under my breath were "Masih hidup". How retarded! All I could do was console Iin and pray for the man lying at my feet to live.

He was still alive, but probably had a concussion. For as little as I know medically, I'm sure there was internal injuries. I know he was still alive and wasn't paralyzed because his 2 fingers were holding onto the leg of the bench when they moved him. There isn't 911 here! The mikrolet driver and a stranger grabbed his arms and ankles and ungracefully carried him to the side of the road. A group of men gathered around, laid him on the tile porch of the closest store, and gave him water.

The doorway of the mikrolet was bent and cracked. There was a little blood on the floor or the mikrolet. Our driver dropped the three of us off at our stop a couple minutes away, and then went back to the site of the accident. It felt so weird not to wait until the police arrive to be a witness.

Then I was so mad that this man left his friend behind!

Among the commotion, there is word that that the motorcycle was stolen. Had he stuck around for his friend, he would have been beaten on the spot. In a totally different way, it makes sense...

Back from Batu

We just had our Charis staff retreat. We went up the mountain to
Batu. We stayed one night at Klub Bunga Resort. Once we arrived, we
played tons games, and even went to the massage therapy pool -
twice! It was chilly at night, but so refreshing! We enjoyed
hanging out with friends as people sang karaoke, played ping pong,
foosball, billiards, board games and play station. We hung out by
the pool to eat grilled corn and traditional Indonesian desserts. My
favorite parts were having conversations, in (mostly) Indonesian.
Definitely fun and relaxing!

ngantuk = tired
ngamuk = mad (actions)
nyamuk = mosquito

Batulicin

Bali

Polehan

Charis

City vs. Village

What if...
City (kota): What if you went to a restaurant for lunch, got out of the car, and were greeted by a man dressed like this?  No lie, this is what happened when we went to a city in Papua. We were no longer
in the desa!  

Village (desa): Here, in contrast, are men (fully clothed) from the village.  Where the boats are hallowed out tree trunks and the dock is made out of only a few wooden planks.

My Eye! My Eye!

The other night, I felt as if something was on my eye. That's not an
unusual sensation to feel multiple times a day. Well, I rubbed it.
But then, maybe I scratched it, or that thing flew in... Well, later
that night, my eye was a little red. The next day, it became more
red. Depending on how I move or close my eye, it feels bruised/
sore. But I can't pin point the pain. And I don't want to press or
rub on it to find out. hopefully I can find the right eye drops
(with the help of a nurse friend here).

In the mean time, I'm enjoying Season 10 of Friends and the 12th day
of Christmas!

I hate cats

Sorry cat lovers. Although, maybe stray cats are really different from house cats. The creepy cat with the bloody-red tail keeps coming by the house. I saw another one sneaking around the garden. And we're pretty sure a cat ate my meatloaf. If not, then, I hate rats. Ahh, the critters... Even the bunch of bananas on the dining table attracts a trail of ants. This morning, Jennifer said she woke up at 3 because a cockroach was on her face! But I wonder. If all of these critters exist just the same in your hometown, why are boundary issues so much different here? Do you have critter issues in your personal space on a daily basis? I know, I know. This sounds so trivial. I just got an e-mail about Nancy's death. I met her briefly in Florida last fall. I hardly knew her. But that was a pivotal week for me. I distinctly remember how she and her husband made it so much easier for me as I anticipated my move out here. She had this sense of peace and honesty. She overflowed with joy in her face and simple love that just made you feel safe. The little things in life make me feel alive. So yes, if receiving Season 10 of Friends for Christmas (the real thing and NOT a pirated copy that skips) or a 3 Musketeers bar is so trivial, so selfish, so materialistic... Well, I don't mind being labeled. I won't deny that I am trivial, selfish and materialistic. I DO want these reflections of love (time invested, thoughtfulness and generosity of friends and family). My soul is alive, refreshed, and encouraged by them. And it is little things like these that I'm able to give... a listening ear for a new friend, sharing a loaf of zucchini bread or my apple cider, writing notes, making JELL-O Instant chocolate pudding for the kids... It's fun that some things aren't different. Anyone feel like mailing Nilla Wafers, Nutter Butter or Cheez-Its?

Yesterday's Meatloaf

Yesterday, we had meat loaf for lunch. But something got to it
before I went to get dinner. The whole thing was on the floor on the
other side of the kitchen! So bummed! I was looking forward to meat
loaf for a week! Well, the green beans and mashed potatoes were
yummy...

Amsterdam

So I told you that I'd let you know how dinner at Amsterdam (the
restaurant) went. It was actually closed for a private party!
Bummed. So, we went to Bunga Bali instead. Tables were still
adorned in red and green linens. Christmas lights hung and the water
fountain was running. And they had their Christmas tree up and
decorated. Cozy and delicious. Baby back ribs, grilled salmon,
sweet carrots,... pretty tasty. Next time, we'll try Amsterdam.

Today, back to studying...

Happy New Year!!!

I played Blockus again with Donny and Kaylor, and won! D and K took Blockus home to practice. For the most part this vacation, we're relaxing and preparing (a little) for the busy months ahead. Beginning next week, it will pick up with school, preparations for baby, visitors and teacher training. For now, it's really good to just hang out. Ibu Darmi made delicious meat loaf with mashed potatoes and green beans! And the Rose Bowl, Illinois/SC game is on!